OPINION: Ousting of PM not at all funny
I SHOULD have listened more in modern history class at high school.
Truth be told, I should have listened more in just about every class at high school.
But after a frustrating week of politics, my modern history ignorance was certainly the one I regretted the most.
Sorry, Ms Rayner.
To be specific, the reason for said frustration has stemmed from my inability to recall the form of government we currently seem to be favouring over democracy.
All I do recall is that it started with an "o" and that I, along with an equally adolescently immature classmate, always laughed because it looked a little like "ostrich".
Adolescent humour aside, I'm struggling to find anything particularly funny about Tony Abbott's ousting as prime minister earlier this week.
In a country as blessed as ours, it has been baffling to observe over the last five years what has effectively become a more life-like, lower-budget and just generally lamer Australian version of Game of Thrones.
But then, I've never really liked Australian television.
Still, one needs to ask: just how low has the highest office in Australia fallen?
As opinion columnists, we are often warned to steer clear of taking sides in politics.
Only, this time, I feel as though it's impossible to be taking sides: they have both been as bad as each other.
Is anyone else not just a little terrified that this is how easy it has become to sack the Prime Minister of Australia?
There was a time when, like them or not, prime ministers were the top of the tree in their career of choice.
Now, it seems as though an Australian cricket captain - a role almost purely dependant on black and white statistical output rather than exponentially grey public opinion - can feel much more secure in his role.
Heck, I even have black and white statistics to prove that.
In the last five years, Australia has had more prime ministers than we have had test cricket captains.
Five have led the country. Three have led the cricket team.
And zero politicians have had to sit out the leadership due to a back injury.
What does everyone think that's saying about the effectiveness of our political system?
Add in the fact that we just lost the Ashes, and it's pretty hard to swallow the fact the nation itself is in even worse shape.
Personal views on the man who started the week as prime minister aside, the problem is just that: he was Prime Minister at the start of the week.
And if we as a country have reached the point where not even our nation's CEO has even a scarab of job security, then what hope do the rest of us have?
I'm not saying a prime minister should be given unconditional support.
I'm not saying a prime minister should avoid accountability.
And no, I'm not even saying a prime minister should deem it wise to wear budgie smugglers even on the hottest day of the year.
Although, I'd like to think my personal views are well and truly known on that last one.
I'm just saying we voted them in; perhaps they deserve their full term before their party disregards that vote.
I guess you could call me old-fashioned when it comes to democracy.
Oh, and by the way: "oligarchy". I found it on Wikipedia.